GENERATION MINDFUL
Playing With The Time-In ToolKit
What if "Stop crying" turned into "I'm listening" for an entire generation?
What Is The Time-In ToolKit?
The Time-In ToolKit is a guided resource that nurtures social and emotional skills by engaging both adult and child in mindful, affirming conversation and play around the many feelings we all experience. Children can be taught social and emotional skills in much the same way we teach them to read and write.
Who Is It For?
This ToolKit can be used by parents, caregivers, therapists, teachers, day care providers, grandparents and more, anyone committed to teaching and guiding children by example, replacing punishment with connection, redirection and discipline.
What's A Time-In?
While time-outs are traditionally punitive experiences that isolate the child for a set amount of time as determined by the adult, Time-Ins are a way to help children learn to calm their body and process their emotions in a safe space (or “Calming Corner™”) so that they can problem-solve, learn and grow. Time-Ins empower children to check in with their bodies when they are feeling strong emotions so that they are able to respond to situations rather than react. When our children feel powerful, safe, and connected, they can learn.
Here is a simple illustration of the three main components or functions of the human brain to serve as an overview of the science behind the developmental approach we are taking. Our goal is to help you practice connecting with your child no matter which part of the brain they (or you!) are in.
Emotional Intelligence In Action
The ToolKit will equip you with practical tools to teach emotional intelligence, foster listening, cooperation, connection, and self-control.
Name It
Start Early
Emotional intelligence begins in infancy when babies bond with caregivers and learn that people will respond to them when they cry or smile. As your baby grows, he or she will become more aware of emotions, gaining the ability to name them, respond to them, and eventually regulate them.
The first step in developing emotional intelligence at any age is the practice of recognizing our emotions. It’s not until a child can identify emotions and respond to the feelings of others that she can also begin to control her own feelings. This may seem like a tall order for a 2-year-old, but studies show that even babies as young as 18 months can recognize and respond to emotions.
Name Feelings
“Grumpy is her new word. Just wanted to share that the Time-In ToolKit works for 2 yr olds!” - Regina, Mom of 2 yo using Time-in ToolKit
When our kids are small and trying to manage emotions - they can't express what they are feeling. They throw tantrums, they throw things, they have meltdowns, they scream and they whine. This is their way of communicating with us. They need help to organize, process and express their feelings in a healthy way instead of punishing them, putting them in time-out, etc.
Understand Feelings
Our thoughts and actions are shaped by our many feelings and experiences. Making time to explore and understand our feelings through our many senses including movement, listening, and meaningful dialogue connects us. We are creating a culture that gives human beings permission to feeling - to be seen, heard, and to grow in harmony with the world.
Start Early
Emotional intelligence begins in infancy when babies bond with caregivers and learn that people will respond to them when they cry or smile. As your baby grows, he or she will become more aware of emotions, gaining the ability to name them, respond to them, and eventually regulate them.
The first step in developing emotional intelligence at any age is the practice of recognizing our emotions. It’s not until a child can identify emotions and respond to the feelings of others that she can also begin to control her own feelings. This may seem like a tall order for a 2-year-old, but studies show that even babies as young as 18 months can recognize and respond to emotions.
Name Feelings
“Grumpy is her new word. Just wanted to share that the Time-In ToolKit works for 2 yr olds!” - Regina, Mom of 2 yo using Time-in ToolKit
When our kids are small and trying to manage emotions - they can't express what they are feeling. They throw tantrums, they throw things, they have meltdowns, they scream and they whine. This is their way of communicating with us. They need help to organize, process and express their feelings in a healthy way instead of punishing them, putting them in time-out, etc.
Understand Feelings
Our thoughts and actions are shaped by our many feelings and experiences. Making time to explore and understand our feelings through our many senses including movement, listening, and meaningful dialogue connects us. We are creating a culture that gives human beings permission to feeling - to be seen, heard, and to grow in harmony with the world.
Feel It
Create Connections
Instead of hitting her mom, or hitting her dog, this sweet 4 yo girl (who has been struggling with impulse control issues and managing her feelings since her parents separated) was able to notice that she was feeling nervous AND to name and to share her feelings with her mama using her SnuggleBuddies plush, Yellow Lion.
She named all four moods, happy (yellow), sad (blue), calm (green) and mad (red) using the toys mood emojis ... instead of lashing out.
This is what self awareness, self control and compassion look like in the making. When we model self-love and forgiveness, children learn self-love and forgiveness.
Sibling Rivalry
Sharing and naming emotions fosters healthy relationships, reducing family tension. Simply listening and validating each family member’s experience is the first step to teaching children the important life skill of conflict resolution.
Tots to Tweens/teens
When your child is feeling overwhelmed, what do they do? 10 year old Meghan has some ideas on this.
Children as old as 9, 10, and 11 are benefiting from the Time-In ToolKit.
Emotional intelligence starts with naming our emotions, but it doesn’t end there. We can also learn to pause before we act on our thoughts and feelings.
Create Connections
Instead of hitting her mom or the family dog, this 4 year old girl who has been struggling with managing her feelings since her parents separated was able to name and share her feelings instead, using her SnuggleBuddies plush.
She named all four moods, happy (yellow), sad (blue), calm (green) and mad (red) using Yellow Lion's mood emojis instead of lashing out - self-control and compassion in the making.
Sibling Rivalry
Sharing and naming emotions fosters healthy relationships, reducing family tension. Simply listening and validating each family member’s experience is the first step to teaching children the important life skill of conflict resolution.
Tots to Tweens/teens
When your child is feeling overwhelmed, what do they do? 10 year old Meghan has some ideas on this.
Children as old as 9, 10, and 11 are benefiting from the Time-In ToolKit.
Emotional intelligence starts with naming our emotions, but it doesn’t end there. We can also learn to pause before we act on our thoughts and feelings.
Heal It
Make Amends
As parents, we can nurture kindness in our children. “It’s kind of like weight training,” says Dr. Ritchie Davidson from the University of Wisconsin. “We found that people can build up their compassion ‘muscle’ and respond to others’ suffering with care and a desire to help.”
When children are given the choice to share, apologize, or offer kind gestures instead of being forced to, they are roughly twice as likely to be generous later. And when kids are praised and recognized for their kindness, they are more likely to help again. The Time-In ToolKit does both
Use What You Learn
Being able to name feelings and the cause behind big emotions is the first step towards building resilience and healthy ways to cope with situations. The video below shows children putting the skills they've learned with their ToolKit into action.
Create Healthy Habits
“I am safe and secure.” That’s the Red Bear 🐻 PeaceMakers card this three years old pulled to talk about with her mom before bedtime. Watch as she tells her mom what it feels like when she feels safe... verses when she feels scared.
This sweet girl has been using the Time-In Toolkit (Family Bundle) for just 2 months and she's is using it to help with her bedtime routine!
Make Amends
As parents, we can nurture kindness in our children. “It’s kind of like weight training,” says Dr. Ritchie Davidson from the University of Wisconsin. “We found that people can build up their compassion ‘muscle’ and respond to others’ suffering with care and a desire to help.”
When children are given the choice to share, apologize, or offer kind gestures instead of being forced to, they are roughly twice as likely to be generous later. And when kids are praised and recognized for their kindness, they are more likely to help again. The Time-In ToolKit does both.
Use What You Learn
Being able to name feelings and the cause behind big emotions is the first step towards building resilience and healthy ways to cope with situations. The video below shows children putting the skills they've learned with their ToolKit into action.
Create Healthy Habits
“I am safe and secure.” That’s the Red Bear 🐻 PeaceMakers card this three years old pulled to talk about with her mom before bedtime. Watch as she tells her mom what it feels like when she feels safe... verses when she feels scared.
This sweet girl has been using the Time-In Toolkit (Family Bundle) for just 2 months and she's is using it to help with her bedtime routine!
Set Up Your Calming Space
The Time-In ToolKit includes six posters, (3) 8"x10", (1) 12" x 16" and (2) 20" x 30". We recommend IKEA frames for quality and price.
The RIBBA frame line by IKEA has a 19 3/4 x 27 1/2" frame that fits the 20" x 30" posters perfectly with a small trim of the white poster margin. Or you can use the 24" x 35 3/4" frame with matting as shown below.
RIBBA frames do not come with a hanging wire. We recommend mounting the posters to the wall using 3M adhesives for no drilling and easy removal.
The FISKBO line by IKEA is another framing option, or you shop online/area craft stores. Sticky tabs for hanging unframed posters are included as well.
How do YOU play with the Time-In ToolKit?
Send us your photos and/or videos to be featured and help us spread the Gen:M love.
GENERATION MINDFUL BLOG
Other Helpful Resources
| Creating a Calming Corner for Small Spaces | When Your Toddler Won't Stop Crying | Six Ways To Intentionally Raise Kind Children | How to Use Time-In's |
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